Hi, I'm Beaver, and I'm a Facebook Freak.

Hi, Beaver.
It started out slowly...I mean, you only have about thirty friends in the beginning, right?
Go on.
Well, at first it was just "Hi, Bob" and "Heya, Mary". Some occasional pokes. A virtual present here and there.
We understand.
And then there it was. That stupid farm. Suddenly, everything was fertilizing crops, milking cows, planting trees and all. And after Farmville was Sorority Life. I got sucked in by the sparkly dresses.
Darn those sparkly dresses!
Calm down, Frank. Let Beaver continue.
SuperPoke Pets was horrible. That turtle...such a cute turtle. I named him Otis. And he was my Otis.
Continue.
But the worst was Mafia Wars. Ohhhh Mafia Wars. I'm on Level 130 now, you know? And I can't stop. I just can't stop...
But you've been getting better, right, Beaver?
Right. I've slowly turned away from the apps and focused on wall posts. And et cetera.
That's great!
And now there's a new problem.
Hmm?
I'm spamming people's walls.
...All right, who wants to go next? Frank?
I need to check my Facebook. Hold on.